Mutual ExChange

I laughed while reading this post, which without trying too hard, examines the nuances in the way men and women process ideas and think about relationships. I hope you will too.

Nigerian Newcomer

We are driving back from the movies. This is our third time together.
The talk is usually sparse, peppered with jokes, and ending with an ‘I had fun, we should do it again’. So we do it again.
Today the air feels different. The movie, a long drama ending with the sad unexpected death of the main character, has triggered something because we shared that experience.

About fifteen minutes into the drive, she cracks open. She says:
“You know what I am scared of? I am afraid of making the wrong decision especially when it comes to relationships. I see couples, some are happy and some are not. And I wonder, how do you know when to fight for something and when to give up on it?”

She takes a deep breath and continues:
“Even the simpler decision, whether to open up to someone or be friends with them, each…

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15 thoughts on “Mutual ExChange

  1. Funny piece, I especially found it funny how 15 mins after the movie had ended, she was already thinking of her life and her fears. His reaction to her conversation sounded like something I’d have done if I wasn’t paying attention to the conversation but heck nothing prepared me for his fear 😀


  2. I thought I was seeing things when I received a notification from you, haha!

    First, I was incensed at his attitude. Then I appreciated his humor and intelligence. Then I questioned the relevance of the whole conversation. Oh—the lady’s nervousness must be called to questioned as well.

    I mean, why can’t dates be dates…and just that? Sometimes our “meaningless chatter” is very sufficient, abeg. Lol :D!


    1. I enjoyed the story as well, the things they were saying but not really saying, the dance between numbers and words and everything in between. She’s looking for security, he thinks it’s too early for commitment . . .

      A date is not usually just a date 😉 But yes, meaningless chatter can be sufficient for some people 😀


      1. I read your last paragraph and realized something. Meaningless chatter isn’t sufficient o. LOL!

        But if you’re anything like me, be my guest and let’s talk Spongebob Squarepants all night long! I give excruciating pain to my dates; I sometimes just go on dates for the ice cream.

        Now, if you’re a good facilitator you could provoke an intelligent conversation that will last all night long! 😀


  3. Timi, thank you so much for sharing this with me today!
    Definitely there are different reactions between the sexes. I am sure that there are many sensitive men out there who can feel almost the same way women do! Ha ha! I liked that the article shows the differences and I have to be on the lookout for the more sensitive ones, my ‘last time around.’ I don’t want any more “macho’ men! Smiles, Robin


  4. I’ve been following naijarookie for a while now. First time I came across his blog, I spent the better part of the night going through his posts.

    As in ehn, the guy had to throw her infinite change loop. Talk about ki la gbe, ki le ju.


  5. Lol, Bunmi, I’m laughing at your example. We can harness our differences and make the world livelier.

    I’m glad you enjoyed the post. I thought those who read Livelytwist would.


  6. On Nigerian Newcomer I commented:
    “This really got me cracking up. I guess the
    exchange, though mutual, is hardly balanced.
    The genders are apparently wired differently.
    I loved this.”

    I like that typifies how differently we reason, and the riveting (sometimes tense) nature of interrelationships. A hypothetical ‘she’ asks, “Tell me one of your short term goals.” The hypothetical ‘he’ is flustered for a sec or two and then says, “Hmmm… like what I’ll like to have for dinner?”


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